Life is so precious

Gerald was 54 years old when he died, that's 216 seasons, 648 months, 2808 weeks, 19656 days, 471744 hours, 28304640 minutes, 1698278400 seconds, 4866 orgasms and the same pencil he had since he was 15. There may be seconds unaccounted for; Gerald, bless his soul, choked to death on his own vomit in a drunken stupor and we are unsure of the exact moment his soul left his body to be with Jesus.

Sarah was 7 years old when she died, that's 2555 sunsets, 126 fish fingers, 17 baby teeth and 2.7 litres of tears. They say that only the good die young which must be why the Lord, in his infinite wisdom, gave Sarah bone cancer in her little knees.

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