Rules for Reading

  1. Read as little as possible. If you can get through life having never read a book, this is ideal.
  2. If you must read something, read poetry, preferably my poetry.
  3. Never, under any circumstances, read the same thing twice. If you've ever read anything twice, you must read it a third time backwards to undo the damage.
  4. Words cannot be "uploaded", they are for speaking, so move your lips when you read (a little tongue action wouldn't go amiss).
  5. Don't waste your time with bookmarks. Just tear out the pages as you go and you will never lose your place.
  6. The best judge of a good book, in the end, is the cover because by the end, that's all that's left.

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